I would not consider myself an avid reader, but I do read something every day – books, blogs, articles, etc. In fact, it is not uncommon for me to be working through a couple of books at a time. Reading is how we stay current and how we keep our minds moving.
I read several different types of books but most center around spiritual formation, leadership, and ministry (I’ll throw in some poetry regularly as well). I rarely read a book without gleaning some helpful nugget or life forming epiphany, but not every book has had overwhelming life impact for me either. However, when a book does impact me deeply, I add it to my “Re-read” list. Then once every year or two, those books make it back on to my credenza as one of the books I’ll read this year.
Eugene Peterson’s, The Contemplative Pastor, is one of those on my regular “Re-read” list. I have just picked it back up recently and have been working slowly through it, yet again. As Peterson begins his book, he sets the foundation that, as a pastor, one needs to come to terms with busyness. That is something I struggle with constantly. In fact, a quick perusal of this site and you will see many posts about slowing down and being present.
Many years ago, I was confronted by a friend that said something to me that has always stayed with me. As we greeted one another, we exchanged the cordial and worn out, “How are you doing?” My response was my usual, “I’m just busy.” What came right back to me was this: “You are as busy as you choose to be.” That come back stopped me in my tracks and has stayed with me for over twenty-five years.
But back to Peterson, in his chapter titled, “The Unbusy Pastor,” he quotes a 4th century church father, Hilary of Tours regarding busyness and activity. Hilary called busyness, “a blasphemous anxiety to do God’s work for him.” Peterson then gives two possible reasons that pastors stay busy. The first is that they are vain and want people to see how important they are so they fill their days with activity. The second reason he gives for busyness is that they are lazy.
I have to admit, these indictments are hard for me to take. But I am thankful for Hilary and for Peterson because their words cause me to slow down and become very clear on what fills my days. Activity can become an escape if we let it. We don’t know what to do, or we don’t want to tackle the hard things so we occupy our time with busyness. I never want to deserve that accusation. Thomas Merton (another very impactful author and thinker in my life) offered this prayer, “Set me free from the laziness that goes about disguised as activity when activity is not demanded of me.”
Sometimes, the most God-honoring thing we can do, is to sit still and wait on the Lord. When we do, we are training ourselves to trust God in all things and we are showing Him that we are trying to do just that.
I encourage you to take some time today to slow down and set some time aside to reflect on what makes up the activity of your day. Is it just busyness attempting to do God’s job for Him? If not, stay with it. But if so, stop and rest in Him.
Clay in the Hands 